Slap your hand to your left cheek in an appropriate sign of shock and/or awe. The recently departed Chopper Reed – Melbourne’s most notorious/beloved massager of laws – is potentially going to be remembered in the only way fitting for a man of his nature: through the medium of musical theatre.
We’ll be breaking all the news on the upcoming smash hit on November 19. Stay tuned.… Read more
We have no words. You decide.
We are well into the blockbuster season, and the shops are stuffed with merchandise for all the big movies: Lone Ranger Lego, Iron Man masks, Monsters University onesies… But not all movie merch makes sense. We dug deep and turned up ten of the most peculiar movie tie-in products, from official toys to weird fan memorabilia.
Edward Cullen ‘Manllow’
Why on earth?
Because if you can’t snuggle up to the real Robert Pattinson, a weird floppy pillow with his face photocopied on to it is surely the next best thing.
Who’s it for?
The Manllow website pushes its product to ‘all the “Twilight”-crazed, lonely women in the world’. We have to wonder if ownership of a Manllow may in fact be contributing to said loneliness, and not the other way around…
The Avengers cologne set
Avengers Assemble (2012)
Why on earth?
We definitely see the logic here: superhero movies like ‘The Avengers’ may have broad appeal, but their core audience is slightly smelly 12 to 19-year-old boys. And, as advertising has repeatedly taught us, the most effective way to transform a nerdy teen into a cool dude overnight is through the judicious application of personal grooming products.… Read more
Vinyl purists rejoice: you can even be a music snob in death. British pranksters And Vinyly offer to press your ashes into a vinyl record to give to loved ones. You can record your own spoken message, or opt for a soundtrack. (You can also opt for portrait painter James Hague to render your likeness on the cover.)
We’ve got a few suggestions to get you started…
‘Kickstart My Heart’ – Mötley Crüe
‘Boys Light Up’ – Australian Crawl
‘I’m Back’ – Eminem
‘Alone’ – Heart
‘Rise’ – Delta Goodrem
Every news site on the planet is madly attempting to get traffic from obsessive royal watcher traffic by increasingly desperate pieces speculating about the sex, weight, species, parentage, temporal status and likely outfit of the forthcoming collaborative human project by Prince William and his wife Kate Middleton.
What will Kate need in hospital? Who’ll be the first to meet the royal infant? How many limbs will the baby have, and will it have the traditional enormous batlike wings of a future monarch? These questions and more have been done to death and so, in a shameless attempt to pander to the 15 per cent of Woman’s Day readers that are aware of the internet, I’ve chosen to answer the only remaining question that no other outlet has seriously addressed: what are the least likely names for your upcoming Official Commonwealth Infant?
Mad Prince George
LL Cool Geoff
Dave Dee Dozy Beaky Mick & Tich
Loud Gay Phil
La Amoré, Thief of Hearts
Jane Plain and Tall
Gozer the Gozerian
!!!… Read more